Mr. A-N

The other day i try an application at facebook... I forgot what is the name of the application... But if i'm not mistaken, who is ur bf's name (first & last letter)... well, i got A.......N huhuhuhu suddenly a name appeared in my head... so i named him Mr. A-N... only me knows the real name of him....hihihi

Friday morning, i wanted to send a sms to him but i changed my mind later... my heart said dat he will contact me soon... And dat midnight, he called me... It surprises me... Is it a coincidence or is it deja vu. Yeah, he is a maniac... He asked 'nafkah batin' from me... LOL! he is not serious, believe me... I dunno why did he always joking about those things (durex, what happens when a girl get excited, tips how to hav a big breast, he pretend to be a maknyah & etc)... I really wander... I asked a male fren not so long time ago... A man will talk dirty not with his loved ones...

When i remember dat thing, i always remind myself dat he's not into me... And i asked him once why did he always talk dirty with me... he said dat i always 'layan' him... What he meant was i'm a good listener and also a good responder... i guess... but sumtimes i do feel dat he will come to me when he is bored... nothing to do...and maybe i'm the last one from the list...

Like i said he likes my fren not me... And God, plz give me strength to live my life... I tried to forget him and i'm sure he'll never ever lost contact with me... I think he really trust me as a fren, a good fren... I remembered when he told me a story about his excoursemate... dat gal is beautiful, sexy but she is a smoker & not virgin... i asked him why dun u try to get her... he said dat "i'm different... when my head says dat she's only a fren, she is... usually i will fall for a gal which i dun know her yet"... dush! a punch got straight to my chest.... dat means i will never had a chance to be with him... see truth is pain...but i still hopping sumday he'll accept me or i will find sumone new...

Yeah, plz open my heart for sumone else...erk i think the right say is "Ya Allah, meet me sumone new...at least he will try to 'ngorat' me... pity me, i'm single for a long time oready"... huh, i still remember a gal fren asked me "u hav a lot of male frens and not one of them is ur bf???"...dush another punch... punch over punch and yet there is no sign of getting new one.... or is it becoz of i'm HEARTLESS??... deym it, I'M MISS HEARTLESS...

Okla, Mr A-N... I want to go to bed... this song is for you.... Muahhhsss

UNTUK SELAMANYA


Andainya ku pergi
Usah disesali
Kerana ku sangsi
Adakah cinta masih di sini

Andainya kau tahu
Ku mencintaimu
Ku pasti dirimu
Tak akan tegar melukaiku

Sampai bila akan begini
Menyimpan rahsia hati
Relakanlah aku pergi
Walau cinta masih di hati
Dan air mata menemani
Langkah ku yang semakin tak pasti
Membawa kelukaan ini

Bila sampai waktu nanti
Ku harap kau kan mengerti
Mungkin bahagia atau derita
takdir ku terima

Andainya kau tahu
Ku mencintaimu
Ku pasti dirimu
Tak akan tegar melukaiku

Sampai bila akan begini menyimpan rahsia hati
Relakanlah aku pergi
Walau cinta masih di hati
Dan air mata menemani
Langkahku yang semakin tak pasti
Membawa kelukaan ini
Bila sampai waktu nanti
Ku harap kau kan mengerti
Mungkin bahagia atau derita
takdir ku terima

Oh Tuhan tunjukkanlah cahaya kebenaran
Kenangan bersamamu
Kan bersemadi untuk selamanya